Dementia Assisting Self Help Group Blog!

  I went to the doctor that day, not knowing what he would say. Had an MRI scan and had to wait forever and a day. The results were not what I expected, he said I had mild vascular dementia. My life changed from that day on, not knowing what was to become. I now try to live my life as each day is my last one. And hope and pray to still have fun.

My eldest Sons first USA house in Westport, Connecticut. An excellent example of American architecture both inside and out.  This was my eldest son's house in Connecticut USA. He, and his family, lived there for over 15 years and have since moved on. "Visual guide to assist in understanding a building's parts" My eldest Son's company's office/workplace. An amazing architectural example of the usage of arrangement and space.

  I arrived at Bridgeways 30 mins early so that I could receive the relevant papers for the Interviews that day with Katie and Reinhard. We discussed the procedure and the order of the students expected. We were all given two questions each to ask.   Promptly on time the first interviewee arrived and the interview began. At first I was a bit apprehensive thinking I better not mess this up! I listened and made some notes then when it was my turn to ask my question I looked directly at the student and I asked her my first question. Her response was both clear, descriptive and precise. I could tell that she was a bit nervous but we took that into consideration. I was amazed at her confidence in responding to the questions from us all. Then it was time for my second and final question and was pleased by the reply.   The same procedure was repeated for all the student interviewee’s. I asked my 2 questions made notes for each student and scored them from 1-5   ...

  On Christmas Day, I woke up feeling both excited and apprehensive wondering how this day would pan out. There were 7 guests coming for lunch plus my 2 children and myself 10 in all. Both my son and daughter said they would do the prep for me which left me to concentrate on the cooking. The meal turned out great and everyone was full after all three courses. Once the meal was over and everything was cleared away, washed up and all was tidy again, I put out drinks, mixer’s, snacks, chocolates and sweet’s. I had devised a Quiz the week before for us all to play in pairs. I wasn’t sure if I could do an all written quiz, so I decided to do a Pictorial Quiz instead. It was based on Films only, I chose ones for all the age groups of my guests. They were eager to play so I gave each pair the question sheets, I set a time limit which they all agreed too and the quiz started. I watched with amusement at the different expressions on the faces of some of them, some frowns , light bulb moment...

I first became aware that something was wrong when my children kept telling me, “Mum, you’ve told me that 10 times already”, yet I could not even recall saying it. I was also misplacing things more and more frequently, which was making me very frustrated and concerned as to the reason why. It was so not me to forget these minor details. At the time I was also fighting a battle with Cancer and Chemotherapy, which made me think that perhaps this was the problem (brain fog). Eventually my children suggested that I should get a full check up with my GP, which I did, and my daughter came with me. I had a memory test which was not great, I then had various other tests done, Scans, MRI etc… Eventually my appointment letter arrived to see a Consultant for my results. On arrival we were shown the results of the tests on the screen, and he explained what they meant. My daughter asked him various questions which she wrote down the answers to. The outcome was that I did have early-stage Vascul...

I was diagnosed with vascular dementia in March 2023. Nobody seemed to be able to tell me what and when to expect any changes. This is not because they do not want to but because they just do not know. Recently, I have noticed a change in my speech. I’m stuttering and unable to find the words that I am trying to say. It seems to be worse when I am talking on the phone to people that I do not know. This makes me feel embarrassed and not want to communicate with people. However, I had to make an important phone call. When they answered the phone, I started stuttering and was very anxious. I decided to explain that I have dementia and my speech goes when I feel nervous. The person on the other side of the phone told me not to worry and to take my time. This really helped me to calm down and enabled me to complete my call. Now when I make a phone call or speak to people I do not know, I tell them about my speech, and it has made me feel much better.

This is my first Christmas since being diagnosed with Dementia. It is also my first Christmas since my mum died and I lost my job due to having dementia. The build up to Christmas was stressful as it is for everyone. Most of the gifts I gave I had to get online as I am not able to go shopping on my own due to mobility issues. I don’t have anyone to help me with my wheelchair. When I ordered online, I had to write everything down in my notebook so I could remember what I ordered and for whom. I managed without too many disasters. On Christmas morning I had mixed feelings. Our usual Christmas day was going to my mum’s and opening presents. I would usually have dinner with mum and my children would go home with their families. This year my children came to mine, opened presents and then went home. I felt as though I had a big hole inside. I felt so lonely and scared. While my family was there, I kept thinking “Is this the last Christmas we will have together? Where I will know them?” I ...

The first feeling I had when I was first diagnosed with vascular dementia was relief that I wasn’t being a drama queen or imagining it. That feeling soon turned to shock as there is no treatment and no diagnoses for when it will get worse. My children who are grown men don’t want to talk about it. I lost my job and felt worthless. I followed information that was given to me by the memory clinic. I now go to a dementia group on a Thursday and Friday. This has given me a purpose in life. I talk to people who are in the same situation as me and we talk about how we cope with different situations. I have also started knitting again and joined a club once a month on Saturdays. This is not a dementia group but really helps with my confidence. I try not to think too far ahead as I find that really daunting. I believe that getting involved in groups and research is the way forward for me, it will keep me busy and help me learn more about dementia. Hopefully I will be able to help other peopl...